Not surprisingly, I fell off the wagon. I say not surprisingly b/c 1) I had two good weeks and I usually slip up and 2) it was a holiday. Unfortunately the holiday meant that I didn't weigh in until two weeks later so I've been all over the place. Accordingly to the scale i"m up 7.2 Who know how much is water and whatever else, but it doesn't really matter, does it?
Does it suck? Damn Straight! Am I giving up? Hell no. Somehow owning it at weigh in helps me. Now I just need to make it until next Wednesday. Then we'll be on vacation. I've already decided I'm not going to go overboard but I'm also not going to be too hard on myself. There will be a lot of walking too so that helps.
It'll be a year end of Sept which is the most depressing part. I "should" be so much further. At least 50lbs I thought. And yet, it's my own doing. I've decided that my body and mind know I'm not in the right head space and until I do come to that I'll never get anywhere.
The one good thing? Last night I was going to say "eff it" and eat McDonalds but I remembered a book I read. I have to think like the person I want to be. The person I want to be wouldn't just give in and eat fatty McDonald's, so I didn't. Also, I didn't keep sight of my Why these last two weeks, big mistake.
Finally, I'm sad to report that Matt said something to me on the 4th of July that threw me. Basically he said he didn't know why I was tracking since we both knew I'd go off plan that night, b/c that's what we do at these things. He was right, but I wish I had proven him wrong. I wish he hadn't put that thought in my head int he first place.
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